Okay – I warn you in advance that this one may be a long one, but I feel the need to vent.

Users.

I don’t like Users.

I had a fairly long discussion yesterday with a couple of people about people who use others for their own advantage. And, quite frankly, it stinks.

As someone who’s worked to get where he is, from the bottom up, and without the need to rely on anyone elses’ reputation, I look at some people and can’t help thinking “And why do you think I should be impressed by you, again?”. Creative talent is a joy to witness, and I love seeing what people can do, but there seem t be far too many people using others as a step-board to their own little piece of fame and glory.

I still remember the happy days of standing in the Three Lions Pub’s window looking out, because the dancefloor was so busy, it lagged me out. In those days, I was just a casual user of SL looking to get away from RL stresses for a little while.

It was the support of friends and family that pushed me to try skills in Second Life and work to express myself creatively in the metaverse. Back then, I had little idea I’d try so many different skillsets out that I have so far.

As my reputation grew, naturally so did people who would try to use me. I got burnt once, and I promised never again, as it hurt that someone I thought I could trust would do that. So ever since, I guess I’ve always been naturally wary about other people, and kept them at arms-length until I got to know them better.

It may be obvious to many that that’s how you should act anyways, but I was a happy care-free individual who enjoyed making people smile and laugh, and I never thought anyone would resent me for it. Showing talent only seemed to aggravate them further.

So be it. You can’t hold yourself back because of other people’s jealousy.. right?

Maybe there’s a limit. Someone I was once very close to told me recently that I’d changed for the worse. But then, who doesn’t change over 6 months? Speaking to a couple of close friends, it was evident that I had changed, but they said that they had changed too. And at any rate, they didn’t think I’d changed much.. admittedly I’m not the guy who sits around the bar making wisecracks as much, anymore.. building and creating can eat up a lot of my time.

But it’s been playing on my mind. My ambition has certainly grown in the past few months.. in the heat of it, I was told I was narcissist and self absorbed. Oh well.. I’ve always given everything I can to my friends when I can, and always been there for them when they’ve needed me. But I guess I still have to take care of number one, and between a busy RL and SL, I can’t be everyone’s dogsbody? I’m a believer in my own talents.. if I don’t believe in myself, then who will?

I’m inclined to believe it’s a combination of factors, which have meant I’m not the same person I was 6 months ago. I think it’s unreasonable to ask me to be the same person when times, circumstances and people change. I still feel the same person, but I want to better and improve myself all the time, and most importantly, I want to learn.

The closing point of the outburst was interesting – that Second Life isn’t the be all and end all. I’ve never believed it was, but it’s a fantastic platform to express yourself creatively, and learn skills that I can apply to in real life. Attracting clients, building to their requirements, sealing deals and negotiating, as well as designing and creatively providing solutions. I’ve used many of the skills I’ve learnt in SL as I have in RL, and vice versa.

So sure, SL isn’t the be all and end all. I’m not rooted in Second Life, as my real life is just as hectic. But SL provides me with a creative platform to showcase myself, and I find that appealing.

At any rate, I’ve worked from the ground up and got myself in a place where I am happy with my Second Life having made new friends and kept old, and learning my lessons about other people, and about myself, along the way. And just for the record, I’m happy with my real life too..

I’ve come a long way, and in that time, myself and everyone else has changed. Because people always change. But I’m thankful that I still respect the people around me, and get on with my life.. and if there’s something I’ll never change into, it’s a user. I’m here to make my own path.. not to hijack anyone else’s ride.